how i can bear the goodbyes

I've grown to be
really good at goodbyes
almost unflinching even
(When once I winced)
at the slow & awkward
unstitching
That finds us
fumbling
& bumping heads
Both timidly
but somehow fervently
tugging at the threads
That bind us
While still trying
not to damage
that frail fabric
Which once held us
Tightly together.

I've grown so accustomed
To goodbyes
that when the time comes
And we're both standing
awkwardly
with a strange emptiness
gaping at our sides
I will even thread my needle
& stitch you shut with care
then top it off with
a kiss for the pain
& a band-aid.

I've become so used
to goodbyes
But it is simply because now,
my heart is always waiting
at the edge of the doorway
with a hand ready to push it open
For your easy escape
I have grown so good at goodbyes
By no longer believing
in the hellos.